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huh...

yesterday...

can you believe that a soap reminded me that i've got the gift of time and how lucky i am to have been given it?!

then i happened to be reading julia cameron's "the artist's way" (yep, still reading it!) and the following resonated with me: "for most blocked creatives, reading is an addiction. we gobble the words of others rather than digest our own thoughts and feelings, rather than cook up something of our own," (pg. 87) and "as blocked creatives, we can be very creative at wriggling out of things," (pg. 88) and "we decide how powerful god is for us... and if we receive a gift beyond our imagining, we often send it back," (pg. 91).

i seriously heard charlie brown's voice scream out in my mind "that's it!" like he does the christmas special when lucy asks him if he has 'the fear of everything'!

then i looked up "eat, pray, love" author elizabeth gilbert and was reading her "thoughts on writing" and was bowled over by her honesty! i don't want to paraphrase ~ read it for yourself! (www.elizabethgilbert.com/writing.htm or just go to www.elizabethgilbert.com and look for "thoughts on writing" down on the right hand side and click there).

at one point while in our bedroom, doing what i can't recall, i said to myself that i'm really going to start making the most of my time, i really am.

then after a slightly stressful financial discussion with hubby before dinner, my mind went back to something i'd read in "the artist's way" earlier in the day about "the poet's market" book by writer's digest and i also remembered that before author debbie macomber was published and she needed to make extra $, she started sending articles off to magazines. (i've been reading her first non-faction book, "knit together" lately and that's where i got that from!) i thought to myself that i've got to try & make some extra $ for us and i'm going to start sending my non-fiction pieces off to mags! so after dinner i looked up "the writer's market 2007" and 2008 editions through our local library sites to see if they have them. i was supposed to call one of the libraries today to see if they can order it for me since our local branch doesn't have it.

i set my alarm for 7 am this morning. i truly wanted to get up early! i wanted to but i couldn't. physically. i was still so tired at 7am this morning that i couldn't stay awake. i need like 10 hours of sleep lately ~ actually, since it's not uninterrupted, i probably get around 7 hours or so, give or take, total. anyway, once i finally did wake up (2 hours later), i felt like crap from my allergies.

it just knocked the spirit in me right down! i want to do something with myself! i really and truly do! UGH! i'm so frustrated right now!

Comments

Anonymous said…
I really like this - especially the part about saying to yourself that you are really going to start making the most of your time.
Time, I have realized, is a most precious gift.

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11:14pm

11:14pm (3/16/09) Watching a documentary Tennessee is so beautiful Head & nose all stuffy Out of ZyrtekD - sigh Want to read but distracted by my clogged head Hubby's snoring a little, restless a lot I worry about him He's so tired, works so much Doesn't get to do what he enjoys often enough (If at all) He willingly took my burdens & made them his own I'm still not used to being taken care of Makes me uncomfortable, guilty I took care of things for so many years Are 2 persons "stuff" too much for 1 person? Even a good, strong man? I know what it is to do more than my "fair share" Though the situation was completely different Is the end result the same?