This Perfectly Imperfect Life

Yesterday, I wrote about my recent writing struggles here  and not knowing where it was coming from or what to do about it. Yesterday afternoon, during an email exchange with bestie G, I had an epiphany, which I did elude knowledge to in yesterday's post, but it didn't hit me until I was hashing it out with G. As I read one of her replies, I thought to myself that it it feels like this writing block is final and something has died inside of me. And then I thought of Ceasar kitty. I stopped writing (again) to take care of him starting in November and cared for him right through New Years, until I had to have him put down on 1/2. And once we found out he had cancer and it was only a matter of time, it was awful time for me. I'm in mourning. I know 'he was just a cat' some would day but I was in my early 20s when I got him and now I'm nearly 40! (That's not helping the writers block either btw - I'm 16 months away from 40?!) Being home day in d...

Hello friends! I can hardly believe it's been a little over two weeks since my last post. Where does the time go anymore? Mother Nature has decided to give is a true Northeast Winter this season, our first (mostly) normal Winter in about a decade. The Midwest and even the South are getting slammed with harsh extremes though and my thoughts & prayers are with them. As I write this, a trio of state plows are rumbling by, rattling the windows & vibrating the floor, clearing away & salting last nights dusting. (Our section of the road is part of a residential U-turn for the state highway we're just off of. Local plows don't touch this area). I don't mind the (bitter, frigid) cold outside, but it's been too chilly for me indoors until the day before yesterday. Whatever adjustment Hubbs made to the boilers is working, yay! With this our first cold & snowy Winter in so long, seeing the beauty of it has made my heart sing with joy! Hubbs has been takin...

Friday

Taken from a 2012 post, which you can find here . You all know I am a big fan of purging - the de-cluttering and simplifying of ones surroundings - because it truly does a mind and soul a world of good. I can't recommend it enough! Well, I've been holding on to some specific items for years. Why? For many reasons, but mainly because I truly liked these things and I had hoped over time they would lose the negativity of situations and people from my past they were associated with. They didn't. It's been in the back of my mind since the end of November to finally get rid of these things. I was ready but, with a sick and passing kitty, and all the emotions I was going through with him, I wasn't ready. If that makes sense. This Saturday afternoon, I finally purged them. Hubbs and I had a spat just before I went back down to the basement to put a load of laundry in the dryer and start another in the wash. I was ticked off, to say the least. Plus I had been ...

Each year I try to pick a word that hopefully encompasses my overall intentions and goals for the new year. I begin thinking about it around Christmas and journaling on it after Christmas and through New Years Eve. My word for 2014 is " Focus ." It may be something that seems to go without saying, so to speak, but it's something I have a lot of trouble with because of my unpredictable health and uncooperative body. Living with disease is anything but simple or easy. I thought it would get easier handling it with time as I get older, but I've been inexplicably wrong about that! It's been getting progressively difficult.  Now that I'm over the shock of it, and out of fear that none of my dreams will ever some true, I've been trying to learn to work with it as best I can. I want to figure out a way I can focus on my overall goals more which works with my unpredictable health and uncooperative body so that by this years end I can hopefully see more pr...

Yesterday, on the second day of this New Year, I had to say goodbye to my beautiful boy, my sweet Ceasar. As heartbreaking as it is, it was the best and right thing to do for him. He was 14 & a half years old and had cancer. We found out on 12/14, but he was doing well despite it, especially once his upper respiratory infection cleared up. We didn't know how much time we had but we were glad to have more with him. And then throughout New Years Eve day, he began to decline and it continued throughout New Years Day. I knew the signs, I'd been through it before with my other boys. (Except one which passed on his own). My last boy. The last of my first kitties. All gone. I just can't believe it. My heart is heavy and sad. I am thankful I have my girl kitties. I can't imagine how awful it would be to come home to an empty house. Between my unpredictable health and being home so much, they are such comforting companions! Oh but how I will miss my beautiful bo...

Cheers to the New Year and to the blessings of the one just ended. May 2014 be a healthy, safe, prosperous & happy one for us all! Sent from my iPhone

Cheers to the New Year and to the blessings of the one just ended. May 2014 be a healthy, safe, prosperous & happy one for us all! Sent from my iPhone